Today was the sentencing of BJ. His family acted very irresponsibly.
He got 8 years.
I love megan a whole lot.

I don't feel alive anymore.
?
I need something, anything to bring me back to life.

I just was told to watch Yes Man because i look a lot like a girl that is in it, the main girl, and i actually do lol

Dear LJ,
He called last night.
bre.

ps:too much homework or i'd say more.

Dear Journal,
That old, sometimes seemingly unreal ghost of my past haunted my dreams last night.
bre.

Well atleast i'm not Megan, who never ever updates! Okay I know it's the end of the summer and i haven't updated since the beginning of the summer, but I guess that shows i had a really great summer!

*Gabbi is having a baby! :] I love he or she so so much already.
*Me and Josh [w] dated all summer, and then I broke up with him afer i got back from virginia and then we started talking last week again and then yesterday i found out he probably got his ex pregnant and we haven't been broken up for too long so i know that he cheated on me. Not the biggest deal ever because i wasn't too crazy about him in the first place, hence the breaking up part. Either way i'm not very thrilled, it does hurt a little. But it's just a paper cut compared to what i went through losing Duane.
*I went to virginia w/kevin.
*I got an apple tattooed on me with Leah and then a week ago i got a micro dermal on my face and my tongue pierced even though i absolutely hate tongue piercings.
*I moved home a couple weeks ago so i can buy stuff for school with my money instead of rent.
*Mike Adams is my newest in my awesome collection of awesome best friends.
*I changed my major AGAIN and now i'm Pre-med
*I have worked at Kangaroo all summer.

That's all i can really think of!

p.s. I met this guy at Goodwill today.

love,
bre

I don't even know where to begin, So i'll just list things as i think of them..

*Gabbi moved in with me
*I have been seeing a guy named Billy Mahaffey who lives in the ATO house and is amazing. He also has a jeep. And not to long ago Jessica Alger and some other people were tripping on acid and we took them to the park in his jeep. We like jeep rides. He's just a pretty tight guy all around.
*We've been going to Topgun and Sally's ALOT since i turned 18
*Last wednesday I went and got billy and we went and got me an extra large double shot margarita and then i went to monroe to meet lora, gabbi, and mike at the blue monkey. Mike was working there that night. And i drank the whole damn margarita by the time i had got there and we had went to the lounge for a minute. Then we went in and starting shooting all sorts of stuff and there was this brilliantly beautiful guy hitting on me. So we went outside to talk because there were tons of people in there, and then i threw up...in front of him. And then me lora and gabbi left and i started screaming that i wanted josh... ??... and then we went to get josh from Sal's [the bar] and then once we got him they said i just started screaming and crying at him.. ?? lol...very long night. I threw up more this night than i ever have in my whole entire life... well except for the night me and gabbi rolled balls a couple weeks ago and then started throwing up after we took an orange channel and then we went to jasons parents house and threw up some more.
*i bought 30 ex tabs last weekend
*we made yet another trip to texarkanna
*matt got drunk and did what he always does.
*me and garan just made bonnaroo plans!!!
*i gotta go to walmart when i'm done here...
*i went to caldwell last night and got high and went to sleep while watching 7 pounds


that's all,
bre

I'm in Ruston, not feeling to well. A mixture of staying up all night wednesday night on vyvance with gabbi and hten sleeping at megans from last night until 5 oclock today and the weather, etc etc. I went to Walgreens a little while ago and got some icecream and some tylenol cold stuff. I was gonna go with kevin but i don't feel like being around people right now. megan being the exception of course. ;) It's history channel and shut eye from here on out for me.

night all,
bre

It's been forever since i've written in here and therefore it would be impossible to reaccount for everything that has happened lately.

We have been rolling away every friday night lately, at Topgun, and then going back to Lora's. It's tons of fun!

Leah came in for a couple days last week. We went to a pike party where there were midgets and bunnies. haha giant bunnies actually and then i kissed a hot chick that had a lip ring, and then anchor brought me and leah lots of bars. And then i spilled beer on my laptop later that night and woke up at four the next evening. Oh yeah we had sushi with the vp and some other pikes haha that was funny.

Ummm My birthday was wednesday but i had duty until 12:30 (oh yeah i got hired as an RA) so hilary, crystal byrd, and nick waited here with me. Ryan came by and got my drink order. Anchor was here at 1230 with flowers and a joint. VeRy sweet except he drives me crazy. Then we went to ATO and drank until 315 and then headed to monroe for the birth of little Aaron. We were there until 4 in the after noon. came back to ruston got dressed, ate elchicos, and then got my lip pierced! fun!!

Last night I went to Delhi and spent the night with duane bc he got the night off because his boat was in vicksburg! It was lovely. We got stuck in a ditch because i was kissing him and he ran straight off the road. lol. some things never change i suppose. And then at 4 this morning he had to wake up to head back and so I got up and came back here, because i couldn't stand to be in that trailer alone, not nowadays.

We were planning on going to dallas this weekend, BuT I have GOT to study because i've fucked off pretty back this week and I have two quizzes that i have got to master on monday!

Oh yeah me and Josh are still doing our thing, He asked me to be his girlfriend the other day and I kind of walked away but besides that we've been doing great.

OhHH and Garan came and picked up 10 vyvance the other day. He's been working the ngiht shift and needed some.

love,
bre

Me & cody are talking AGAIN.

No I'm not kidding.

Me and Megan got aim again!!!!! SOO excited about that.

I'll be 18 in 16 days.

love,
bre

morning lj,
I'm up pretty early today during break. got lots of stuff to do! I have to get my tires lined up and rotated, meet up with josh at some point just to see his pretty face, do some recycling, and get my roommates stuff from her newly ex-boyfriend. Craziness that is.

I'm in my mamaws room listening to vh1 music videos, drinking coffee, and writing in here.

Blaise is going home today, and my aunt lori coming up, but i'm gonna head out tonight so I can spend some time with megan!

love love,
bre

Last weekend was long & wild. Thursday night I went to Sallys, Friday topgun, and saturday bourbon st.
It was long long long, and we drank alcohol the ENTIRE weekend and moved lora's furniture. Friday night I rolled. Scottie sent me a blue tab to topgun with one of his friends and then later that night we went to pick up more and i got another blue. I was driving jared grahams truck, full of people, into the worst part of monroe to get jiggs. I was stressed the hell out, then we almost got in a wreck because I was pulling out from a stop sign and spun out and it fish tailed. We drank 6 cases of beer in those 3 days.

I could never ever put everything in here from that weekend. It was ridiculous and I loved it, but never EVER want to relive it again.

I moved into a new room and now i have a roomate. Brennan helped me move everything yesterday. Oh yeah I have 3 b's and and a this quarter! It could have been better but i definitely overloaded my schedule! I am now in stelrington and my sister, blaise, is here and we're spending time with the grandparents.

I miss megan, her birthday was yesterday.

love,
bre

yesterday I got my car outta the shop $537.14
Then went to my room and got dressed to go see Duane. Then went to Delhi. We rolled last night on jiggs that were shaped like what they were and single stacked! It was wild. I had 2 homer simpsons that were blue and shaped like his head and rolled the night away, off of TWO! lol it was amazing. And then there were white smurfs and red and orange transformers! I rolled harder than anyone because the blues were the best and i took 2 of em, the most outta anyone. Garan and Dust came over to play poker haha. That was a little strange but not really. Me & duane had lots of fun! :)

I got up and came home after we had breakfast around 2 because he was gonna get his rims put on and all kinds of nonsense and I felt like being lazy! So I came home and there are fresh sheets on my bed and I took a bath. I feel great somehow!! :)

love always,
bre

It has been so dang long since i've updated! Here is what i recall:

Graffiti Party: There was a graffiti party at the ATO house. Everyone wore white and wrote on each other with highlighters, so much fun. I was on Vyvance and out my mind! (this was a thursday)

That Friday night a guy named Ryan that I had met the night before invited me to come back and just drink with all of them. I beat ass playing Presidents and Assholes and at about 1 I exited like a lady and went home.

Valentine's Day: I sat around and watched all kinds of movies that day and then that night I went to one of Brennan's friends houses. His name is Joram. We had went to see a movie not too long ago. Well we decided to drink, LOTs of raspberry vodka with Sprite while playing UNO. I have abosolutely no idea what happened after he sat down on the bed next to me. I just remember waking up after that. With no sheets on my bed, my shirt on backwards lol and my car was somehow okay?? haha I was SOOO hungover. That night will forever remain a mystery.

OH yeah and last friday I had two math tests. Well me and Kristen and Jonathon started out the night studying until we decided to go get high. Then me and Kristen decided on a vyvance night. It's really funny how some of my calculus friends turned out to be so amazing! lol once me and kristen had gotten high with jonathon, he went back to monroe and me and her went and watched religulous and talked about philosophy, religion, and just the world in general all night long and ended up only studying for about 2 hours before my first test. I made a 78 on it which is amazing since I didn't study much for it at all. We're still waiting on our calculus grades!

Me & megan have been living the quite life lately and loving it. Lora of course has been out on the town or something, we really haven't seen her much. Samuel is home right now. I'm at home and waiting on my car to get fixed in Ruston and then we're gonna go get it. Classes don't resume for me until Friday! Me & megan's birthday's are in the upcoming month!!

Overall everything is so amazing. I'm about to finish my second quarter of college, with amazing grades, friends, and family.

love always,
bre

Me & megan have been on the phone for a couple hours just doing our own thing, when Leah beeps in and I put us all on 3 way. Leah tells us she's two pregnancy test down and thinks their positive, but she was headed to get 2 more. She gets off the phone eventually and then we get another phone call and she is definitely pregnant. However, it's only an almost baby we think, because she seems pretty set on the abortion pill. It's something I had never heard of until I googled it, but you can take it up until your 8 weeks pregnant and it aborts the baby. & that is the story of the almost baby in our lives right now.

I'm waiting around waiting on the rain to beat down, reading my new Time and hearing the news of babys and megans adventures to fast food joints. It was really hot this morning, I wore a tank top to class. It is February so undoubtedly that means rain soon.

Lora WILL NOT go to class.

-bre

Me & Megan are watching the grammy's.
& discussing things that have and might never be again.

Do people ever really change? Or just their circumstances and how they react to them?


-bre

This weekend we have done a whole lot of nothing but in a great way! Friday night once megan got off work we just sat at Loras. We tried to learn to do the stinky leg. Did Not work. And then around 2 we went to IHOP and me and megan had a really long "fight" because I wanted her to eat the last piece of lora's waffle, but she thought it was too big of a fight. This is all on video. lmao. And then we had to get peter pan and pocahontas before they go in the vault.

Then all day yesterday I was at my grandparents doing laundry and stuff. Then lora and megan came and got me from there at around 10 and we went to just about every fast food joint on the South Side looking for milk shakes!!! Didn't find those either. We found some at Wendys but they were watery. And then we fucked off the rest of the night.

All day today i have slept because megan has been at work, and everytime I stay here while she works I sleep all day. Every damn time.

Now Lora is about to come over here and megans on her way home so we can get some Hooters and watch the second half of the game!!

Peace,
bre

I updated today in Chemistry, but once i started typing i realized since i was in an auditorium style classroom, half of the world could read what i was writing!!

Um.. Not much to write about. It's really cold outside, and i have been wearing this hat and glove set that lora gave me! I think i'm riding to monroe with hilary tomorrow. I dunno what I'm gonna do about my car! I kinda want to call my father, but that doesn't seem like the best idea considering i'll probably just end up crushed because he won't care to do anything about it.

Tonight I tried to study for my trig test tomorrow, but i learned that when i've been sitting in class dazing off every morning because i'm usually half dead in there, he was actually teaching stuff that it takes time to learn. So i came back here, megan me and mrs rita talked on 3 way while i was in tolliver until i gave up, anyways i came here and played those games that when you win they give money to world hunger. I think that way I didn't just waste my time instead of studying. I wasted my time giving to the hunger. Oh & I posted a myspace bulletin about how people are always on there just talking about themselves in surveys and that they should be helping the world instead. vain vain people.

OH YEAH!! oh geez story of the year..
last night I was on the phone with a friend from engineering and we were about to start working on our impellers separate but we realized in teams that would be easier. We have to build them on solid works and then send them to be fabricated. Well he lives in west monroe so i told him he could just come here and stay with me if he stayed on his side of the bed lol! Well around 130 or 2 when we were finishing up katelyn (soccer girl) starts messaging me. She seems to be doing this more and more here lately. Well she decides she wants to come over and when I say someone is here, she gets pissy, so i tell her to come on. So last night i had a slumber party. Me, her in the middle of course, and then jonathon. lmao

And then just a minute ago, she asked if she could come distract me from my studying. I asked her for a rain check because we wouldn't get any sleep. I just really need some rest.

On that note, I'm about to pass out!!
tgif,
bre

I'm in Chemistry right now.
Trig test tomorrow.

Megan & Lora brought my phone back yesterday!! :)

Megan update now you bad hoe.
i love you.

-bre

Well it's been a very long weekend! But in a good way.
Me & Dev through a party Thursday at her apartment! It was a blast, Lora even came! We stayed up all night on Vyvance. Then Friday me and Lora went to Forsythe, The Beadenhorn, and the new Coca Cola museum. It was a fun day!!
That night we had a bed in and sold some drugs to some people[lol], then we got in the hot tub and got drunk!
Saturday night we went to the corner and I got SMASHED and came back to Ruston with some friends.
My car is broken. Oh yeah I left my phone at lora's last night. SO now I have no phone and no car.
ohhhh &&& I spilled water on my math notebook while doing homework a little while ago.

But all in all I've had a good night. I've been watching nick at night and chilling. & I know it'll all get better!

about to pass out after a very long day without car or phone,
bre